1/06/09

half year been past..
hv more half year to go..
time had past so fast..
rmrb back work time,valentine,birthday..
all the happy stuff...
although need to attend the stupid NS..
but hv been past adi..
all as memory..
for me,this year valentine n birthday r most memorable..


and the most lucky..i meet him in my life..
although the r/s over..but i still care for u..

不想

不想睡，睡了。
不想起，起了。
不想活。

moody

morning wake..quite gt mood geh..
coz slp enough,somemore good weather..
til fetch feli start jam...keep diuING ppl
bad mood d..some more the sun out..
hot die..
till college thr somemore no parking..
fuck
til park so far..walk far..
fuck
then reach college find class..
almost find whole college d..
cant find..
fuck
then i take the map find alone..
feli talk on phone with her hong hong..
find find har feel fed up jor..
wan fong hei..wan diu ppl..wan back home
DONT WAN GO CLASS D...fuck
but think think har...bit bit thing i also fong hei..
nt good...must gin qi!!!like treat him..
so..keep on jia you find..
at last,gv me find dao jor..
go in class..all ppl gap g us lo..
ofc la,so late d...
then awhile,lecturer say break 5min..
go out smoke...meet a kaki..
gether talk har n smoke har lo...
then back in class...
dream dream har...say time up...
can back jor..
suprise....nt til 2 meh?
tat time only 1:15 jek
haha
good!!!fast fast back...
then go pavilion meet cy,ck..
ck fat jor er...some more say im thin jor
haha....then go J.CO eat donat..
da bao jor few for him..
after fetch feli back..go find him
sometime shouldnt ask geh thing..
pin pin go ask...
at last gt geh answer as ur guess..
n u dont wan tat as the answer geh..
at last?think much thr..
self take geh..
after tat,back home...
watch movie..thinking after finish watch the movie..
wat else i can do leh?
sei leh!!!!
life suck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
wtf!!!!!
although knw my gin qi is mou wei..
but still blindly do it..
I DONT MIND..
love blind ba..

不要

我不要！！！！！！！！！！！
不要酱啦，好吗???
可以不要酱对我吗??
我不要！！！！！！！！
不要不要不要不要不要啊！！！！！！！！！
像以前酱不好吗??
啊啊。。不要酱啦！！！！！

不要不要不要！！！！！！！！！

爱

很爱你，你应该不知吧。
很信你，你不知。
我做的，有时不代表那个意思。
我不做的，也不代表我没那个意思。
有时做和想的都不一样。
简单来讲可以说是口是心非。
但要表达都太迟了。
感觉没了。
有缘都没分了。
都是本人的错。

Genting Trip 20/05/09

23/05/09 0305am
actually goin genting on 19 d..
but coz of i gt Loreal training on wed..
so,i go up on wed..
after the training,i ask him to fetch me to bus station..
til reach kl centre..he put me at thr geh front door..
erm,if v still together..he wont put me there ba..
still remember,after gt SPM result..
v goin PD..
he fetch us go to the bus station..
and wait me til i up bus only he lefted..
n when he fetch me to puduraya bus stop..
n wait me up til bus only he lefted too..(masjid tanah)
erm..while i down from his car..
he say enjoy my trip..
im thinking,how would i enjoy without u..
damn hoping u coming together with me..
then alone taking bus till half mountain..
then taking cabel car alone..(scare scare d)
view from inside of the cabel car

til reach thr find them..
then 8pm going for dinner..
cy parent fetch us go half mountain dinner..
after tat v back genting...
v thot go find the lover garden..
haha,cant find...
at genting parking thr..
c dao our car..
so keep take pic thr..
then go in 1st world there ply..
after tat v back room..
take out the redwine..
v wondering how to open the redwine..
at last,haha...
push in the "sut"...
then all started drink...
yeuk...wan vomit...
then plying card..n decided who lose..
will drink the whole glass of wine..
aiyoh...normaly day didnt c me win gah..
tis time win win n win..
cant drink..
at last lose jor..can drink..
drink til me face red red jor...
then start sms him..
asking izit no chance again being together back?
the same answer as i guess...
but i wont never guess his feeling for me now is zero..
cry die there...haha
erm..all think drink not enough d..
then go down to find wine..
but find everywhr also didnt hv..
just hv beer...yeuk....
so back room 1st..
cy,cw,wj go eat..
i n feli back room sin..
then chat a while on phone awhile with him..
saying tat im not drunk..
tat all the thing im mention on msg r true..
but i think he wont care about tat adi..
then slp..
til morning..bath n back KL..
v eat our breakfast at half mountain also..
while tat,cy gv me listen a song..我知道 by2
the lyric just touch my heart..
just like saying my case..
after reach KL,raining..
he love rain day...
then v go sing k...
after finish,v goin feli family hv our dinner..
after tat v go yam cha wit jb n ying..
then back home..
slp on 5am..
then wake up at 6pm on d another day..
feel blur..feel like goin to faint..
the whole day just stay at home..

college life goin to start soon

18/05...orientation in tarc...
v really think tarc college our baba buka punya!
late d....hehe!
walk thr walk here like soh poh...
too big d...
till thr...take jor a fail...n tarc shirt...
then go into the hall..
feel naik kereta jor..
fast fast out from thr...
then bleh lo..
hehe...then while walk back to car..
c dao long time no c geh cy...thin dao..(jeolous)
then ask them fast fast go jor admin then out..
v go pizza thr sin lo..
eat eat eat...
thy come d..join gether eat lo...
then gether back kl,thy back jb thr..
i back home..damn nt feeling well..
then late bit join them with ying..
go jor calorie cafe...
haha.....feli scare
when bill damn funny..
gamble win geh coin all take out n pay...



wat dat!!!!
then when goin back home..
ying drive my car..
wow,damn nervous...
then til loke yew thr..i drive back...
then back home lo...















19/5
thx for reject my offer nicely..
erm..again orientation...
late bit..make student id..
go in hall awhile..then back..
wj situation same with mama at 1st..
erm..eat finish..
go jor sgwang n low yat awhile for the fuck cheque..
then back home...
til nitez at home...
thy go jor genting..wj situation back normal again..
left me alone..
but tumpang happy for her too...
2molo hv to go loreal interview/training..
nid wake up early again..
slp few hour recently..still can tahan wor..
good..haha...


-end-

戏的影响

“忍耐能让奇迹发生”。。
很想这会真的发生。。
但，是真吗?
是个幼子和逃避的想法吧。。


晚。。
吓倒人了。。
第一个打来的，是她。。
谢谢你关心，真的很感动。。
我不是要吓人的。。
我很想酱做，但想到后果！
也想到酱的痛也不算什么路！

第二个打来的，是他。。
不好意思，吓倒你。。
谢谢关心，心想(u mind?)
傻婆，当然啦！！
是好朋友吗！！


谢谢好朋友的关心。。

霸道的我

我需要很多安全感的人。。
但我。。给不到人家。。
结果，就是酱吧。。
一个小小的动作能让感觉跑了。。
能让结果无法想象。。
这也是自己拿来的吧。。
活该..

自己给不到的，。。期望人家给。。
天啊，为什么我酱霸道的啊？！

cant let go..

mm sek dak..
hope im god..
wat i wan..wat wish i make..
can b true..
but im not..
xiong leave tis cruel place..
to a peace,without prob place..
CANT
just hope life gt bz soon..
hope tis world without love..
no hurt no heart pain..
im selfish..
but all tis always happen on me..
im suck..
my life suck
now will not think how happy im in past..
sad cover all..
feel like mm xiong in love again..
scare the fucking feeling back..
y?
y tis must happen..
time..tat all i need
if i could back to past..
it will b wondeful..
mayb tis my bao yin..

cant control..

since knw u happy til the day b4 v break..
break up with u really make me almost crazy..
tears fall ,cant control..
heart pain..cant control..
never try like tis b4..
mayb past got,but forget d..
coz the happiness of our..
make me forget all the thing..
hoping together back with u..
but i knw..will never ba..
u decided tis way..
must gt the coz..
but if u really could try it once more..
im willing
without u,feel like hell..
really xiong go back to camp..
hide in the peace place..
hope to lose memory..
hope im not wear tat shirt on tat day..
without u..really feel damn blur..

when knw got chance to c u today..
really damn nervous..n happy..
nervous coz scare v will speechless with each other..
happy..coz could c u..
worry..u r bei,pain..
sad..cant take care of u..
wanna..help u put losen..
dont wanna leave u..